RTÉ Sport soccer

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


The car revs loudly and within secounds he roughly grabs the handbrake and we drift around the sharp corner. My heart beats so fast especially as the car lunges us about hard yet i can't seem to turn my eyes away from his face even with an entire world of roads, tall buildings and the night sky rushing towards us. I fell so safe next to him, i know he's in control and he would never let anything happen to me. Within a few minutes we are far away from town and out in a deserted field, the squeel of tyres and roaring engines still ringing in my ears.
The car spins around and comes to a stop and scott gives me a look that says everything, a devilish wide mouthed grin and a we can do anything and get away with it look and at the same time a look that says live in the moment it's the only way to live life and this moment is one we will remember forever. I can feel my heart beating out of my chest it's never beaten so fast my whole life and yet as he lunges towards me and pushes his lips to mine it's speeds up even more,i think to myself you are one lucky girl. I barely have time to think as he pulls each item of clothes off me and althought i'd love to help him out he moves so fast i'm naked in a matter of secounds. He removes his clothes even quicker and i don't even get to see him naked before feeling him deep inside me.
This is the first time we have ever been naked with each other before so i have no idea what size he is but he feels huge to me streching me right out being all in can take and i think i couldnt take another inch without fainting but all the same i love it and looking up at him wildly thrusting i realise at that moment i love him. This guy who only a few hours ago was a good friend who i thought was kinda hot but nothing special was the man i loved, how mad is life.
An hour or two later he is dropping me home and kissing me goodnight, only our secound ever kiss by the way and i'm in heaven, he says he will text me later and as i wal slowly to the door i can't help but look back to see the car speed around the corner and smile to myself. I almost float through the door and once inside i realise my mam might still be awake so i creep up to bed not making a sound wrap myself up in my warm duvet and drift off to sleep happier than i can ever remember being.
I awake to the sound of plates smashing loudly against the walls downstairs, the door slams and i angry footsteps pound the footpath outside. I hurriedly stumble towards my window stubbing my toe against my bed, the pain is instant and infuriating but i hobble over to my window quickly to see who is leaving and responsible for all this racket. The tall, broad and fuming figure of my dad is marching out onto the road. At first i don't understand what's going on until my half asleep brain finally wakes up and realises that my dad has stormed out after an almighty row with my mam, iv'e never seen them like this before, it's scares me and i frantically try to make sense of it. To come up with some logical explanation why this has happened, something must have caused it but i'm drawing a blank.
I frantically pull on the nearest clothes i can find before creeping slowly downstairs. The kitchen door is slightely ajar as i try to silentely push through it in one fluid movement without making a single sound but i was never the most gracefull creature and i stumble, fall into the door and enter the room with my hands strechted out in front, a loud 'AAAGGH' is the first word to fall out of my mouth this day as i'm braced for a violent crash only to be stopped quickly by the kitchen counter top embrasing my out streched palm.The huddled and frail figure of my mam slumps against the back door, her eyes gazing towards me, i think for a secound she is about to laugh until i realise she is not looking at me but straight through me.
I tentatively and quietely ask 'mam are you okay?'. I get no response so i repeat it louder still no answer comes. Creeping towards her i rest my hands gentely on her shoulders and ask in the most soathing and calming voice as i can muster 'is there anything i can do to help?' Finally i get a quiet response 'he's gone' secounds pass yet seem like an eternity before she adds 'he's gone the bastard and he's not coming back!'
'What happened?' i ask confused and desperately trying to hold back the tears, i need to be strong for her. 'He's found a new family and doesn't want us anymore,he doesn't want me and he doesn't want you!'she looks up at me for those last two words, a look of anger, bitterness and resentment. I can feel the tears already forming in my eyes the wave of emotion washing over me, knocking me down and crushing me. I can't bear this feeling and i can't let her see how she's hurt me so in a matter of secounds i'm rushing out the backdoor running, running and speeding away from that place as fast as i'm able, tears spilling down my face everybit as heavy and wet as the rain that is now falling on my head. I'm getting soaked and i don't care i keep running until my legs no longer move me forward and i collapse breathless, soaked and broken against a nearby wall. The wall has a ledge which hangs over my head protecting me from anymore downfall which i'm thankfull for as i rest my head back against the dry concrete. My bones fell so heavy now i couldnt get up if i wanted to, staring off into the distance overlooking the town my eyes begin to feel as heavy as my bones. I try to keep them open but the weight is too much and before i know it i'm asleep hoping nobody sees me like this.
I wake sometime later and at first i dont know where i am until i look around and realise i'm in a warm bed, the walls are covered in posters of expensive and to be honest quite sexy cars and if not cars then half naked women. Georgeous women with pouting faces and huge breasts almost falling out of there tops, i have nothing in common with these women, i don't have those perfect figures or huge boobs, i'm so jealous of the way guys lear after these perfect women and i couldn't be futher away from that.
Hearing footsteps coming up the stairs i'm snapped out of my self loathing and frantically scanning the room for a way out of this situation. The window seems just about big enough to squeeze through so i speedily toss the duvet aside and leap out of bed towards the window. Only to notice the coldness grasping at my exposed skin. My naked skin! Shit not only have i been dragged into a strange mans bedroom but he has stripped me naked and oh god he must have plans to do unspeakable things to me. I notice a baseball bat leaning up against the wardrobe as the footsteps get louder and louder. I quickely grab it and hide behind the door frame perfectely positioned to swing at whoever enters in the next few secounds. My heart is beating through my chest and adreneline is rushing through my naked and terrified body.
The door slowly creeps open, i decide it's now or never so i lunge forward and swing wildly opening i hit cleanly and connect. i need to hurt this weirdo before he hurts me. Involuntaraly my eyes close as i swing so i don't see what or who i hit but i hear a loud banging and crashing of wood against metal and something else. And a voice moaning fucking hell.Iv'e done hit it! I must have with all that noise and racket. Opening my eyes to survey the damage i see the figure of a man on the floor, a metal tray flung across the ground and a half full half spilled plate of cooked breakfast balancing on the man's stomach. Looking down at this fallen figure in the half darkened hallway i firstly notice his eyes, his bright blue eyes sparkling even in this darkness. Those eyes look so familiar to me, though i can't place them. My brain is so occupied with trying to remember where i know them from that i fail to react as he pulls himself up from the hard ground, it's only as he smashes the plate full of food against the wall with all his strenght that this deafing sound shakes me out of my wondering. I'm frozen like a rabbit in the headlights i'm unable to move or react.I have no idea how to react in this situation and i start to panic.
I wanna turn and run but there is nowhere to go and even if there was i wouldn't be able to bring myself to move. He limps out of the shadow and is almost growls and seems animalistic ready to pounce on me and as i prepare myself for the worst i'm greeted by the most beautiful sight and releif rushes through my entire body. It's scott, my scott! All this time iv'e been in his bedroom and he was the one who brought me in from the cold to take care of me. I leap into his arms and kiss him furiousely, i can sense his annoyance at the tense situation and his surprise at my sudden leap but his initial reluctance to enjoy my lips falls away and in no time at all we are awkwardly fumbling towards the bed and laughing at ourselves.
He's lying naked on his bed fast asleep as i'm wrapped up in him and taking in this room, the rows upon rows of cd's and the large but old tv in the corner of the room facing us. The dark brown and red painted walls bare exept for a few posters of celtic players and one of a extremely large breasted and topless model. It's no wonder i didn't recognise this room as scott's, clearly it's a man's room but there is nothing personal to show in the entire place. No personal photos, no momentos and certainly nothing warm or welcoming, unless you count those fake breasts as welcoming. I would think more about this but my stomach grumbles and i realise i haven't eaten since yesterday morning and the food littered across the landing floor doesn't look too appetising so after throwing on some clothes and a quick clean up i make us both some breakfast and am just climbing back into bed when my man wakes up.
''Did I wake you baby? i'm sorry''
'' No no it wasn't you just the smell of that hot tea and that tasty looking fry up, did you make it yourself?''
''Yes'' i beam with pride.
''Well you are full of surprises, talented in the bedroom, the kitchen and handy with a baseball bat''
I laugh quietely and turn my eyes to the floor, embarassed at my almost violent episode and the situation as a whole. Noticing this scott takes my cheek gently in his hand and kisses my lips ever so tenderely before whispering in my ear ''It's okay babe you have nothing to be embarassed about and your always welcome here.I craddle my head on his chest and close my eyes happy and contented. I have nothing to worry about in the world when i'm here. The next few months are spent between school, here and the occasion visit back home. The first time i went back from scott's was the worst, i had been out for two whole days and nights and expected to get shouted and roared at, or at least to be grounded and punished but my mam hardly noticed i had gone at all. She had occupied her time not with worrying about me or trying to find me but by cursing my now vanished dad's name and drowning herself in an ocean of cheap booze. Hear i was sixteen almost seventeen and apparantely i needed no more raising or family love, not that i ever got much. One parent had literally abandoned me and the other may has well have for all the good she did. Thank god i was an only child and no other siblings had to put up with them.
I was so grateful for the time spent at scotts house, his mam worked the night shift at the hospital leaving us the house to ourselves most days and when she was around ahe would cook for both of us, i think she liked me because she always gave me extra and asked how i was and when we would disappear up to scotts room she would joke '' Don't do anything i wouldn't do'' The only time she ever interfeared with us if you can call it that was to pull me aside one day and quietley ask if i was taking the right precautions. I said i was and she never mentioned it again, and to be honest i was glad that someone cared enough to ask.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010


Traffic mabye? he could be caught in rush hour traffic possibly,althought not at this time of night. I slowly pace up the pavement each foot step slow and resounding like the slow tick of the hand on a clock. He might've got caught up at work doing some unexpected overtime, but at 9.22 that would be over three hours of overtime!
I take the phone out of my pocket and check to see if iv'e received any new texts, no not one.
Three youths in hoodies, two guys about seventeen or eighteen and a young girl around sixteen hang around on the nearby bench which makes me very uneasy. I'm sure wearing a hooded top while hanging out with your mates is no reason to jump to conclusions but to me i'm always convinced that i will be the next mornings headline : LOCAL GIRL MUGGED AND BEATEN BY YOUTHS or LOCAL GIRL BRUTAL RAPED FOUND DEAD IN BUSHES or STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL YOUNG WOMAN BRUTALLY BEATEN AND GANG RAPED BY VICIOUS THUGS okay mabye not the most likely of headlines but possible.
I run out of patience and try calling him, the phone just rings out and one of the youths eyes me up. I don't know wheter to be angry with darragh or scared of this guy eying me up, i go with anger the overiding emotion at this minute. Another twenty minutes goes by, ten minutes of pacing, worrying, the ocasional look and laugh from this once frightening but now annoying threesome. The gang get up and slowly walk away,and this leaves me more room to pace up and down the pavement past the bench before circling back. Each time i consider continuing walking and heading home but i turn back convinced that as soon as i leave he will turn up and i will have stupidly have missed him.
In the distance i see his car coming towards me, a wave of releif washes over me. I wasn't stood up he's finally here, and then the anger sets in. Why was he so late? he better have a damn good reason for making me wait or i'm gonna give him hell. The car pulls closer only it's not his car, it's the same make, same colour same year and even the guy driving it looks like him only older and not as good looking. DAMN IT!! I feel like such an idiot. Anger and embarassment coarse through my body in equal measures and i don't know wheter it's the embarrasment of this or the anger at the situation iv'e let him put me through but i don't wait a secound longer, my feet are pounding down the pavement as fast as they can carry me.

Monday, July 19, 2010

First time...p3

I gaze out the window at absolutely nothing for a few mins and when i steal a quick subtle glance from the blonde she too is staring nonchalantely out her window facing the other direction. Thinking to myself that i should just go back to sleep and stop gaucking at this poor girl i turn my head away again only to notice that even though her jacket is covering her lap from my angle i can just about see her hand gently moving between her legs. At first i think im imaging it, it can't be. But moving over one seat i get a better look and yes she is moving her hand around her crotch. It wouldn't be noticable if i wasn't staring right at it.
She looks back towards me again but i look away sharply yet this time i dont turn completely i keep my head at an angle so out of the corner of my eye i can just make her out. It's definetely now she is staring at me and touching her self. I have no idea why i'm average looking at best and she is stunning, to intimidate me? for the thrill of staring at a stranger without getting caught or for the pure hell of it? Either way it's happening and is starting to arouse me. Entirely out of character i turn back towards her and hold her gaze this time she doesn't turn away, we two strangers staring boldly at each other on this dark secluded train battling for supremecy willing the other to either cower or do the unexpect and continue this strange encounter.
Feeling brave for some reason mabye because of the blood rushing to a certain part of my body i let me hand wander down to the buttons on my jeans and after a deep breath i unbutton the first. It seems to go unoticed so i continue, the secound falls open then the third each one seems to be a deafening bang of exlposion to me yet is silent to her. Finally the last button falls open to reveal my blood filled member and at last the expression on her face changes, she bites her lip roughly lets out a moan and her hand moves rapidly now. The coat falls from her lap and everything is on show now.
Two fingers thrust deep inside her frantically and her moans at first almost silent are noticable now. Faster and faster her fingers move as she almost growls towards me before biting her lip violentely closing her eyes throwing her head back and arching her back she gasps and then almost makes a satisfied sound almost like a purr. Eyes still closed she grins hapilly to herself until a few secounds later she opens her eyes looks back towards me and my exposed yet untouched member and in afraction of a secound becomes incredibly embarassed. Hurrieldly she tidies her self open grabs her handbag and fallen coat from the dirty floor and begins speeding into the next carriage.
Her high heeled footsteps seem to be the booming sound calling an end to this lustful late night affair as my heart sinks with each step. And yet as the footsteps slow down and she looks back over her shoulder and my still exposed and throbbing member my heart beats faster as she passes for a secound with a thought full look on her face as she decides her next move. With a smile she makes her decision and those high heels move rapidly towards me.....
In a matter of secounds she has pounced and is stradling my lap and sliding herself down onto my hardness, her eyes violent with exitement as she takes me in. A quite moan from her lips and were off rushing out of the traps as she moves on me at speed.
As fast as she rides me at first she only seems to get faster and faster, i find it hard to look away from this only able to tear my eyes away to gaze upon her lustful face and look around to make sure no passengers from another carriage enter and interupt us, please no not now this pleasure can't be interrupted now i couldn't take it.
I take her waist in my hands gripping tight as she moves frantically yet smoothly over me, her eyes close she bites her lip tightly now as she lets out a low long groan and i feel my lap awash with her liquid exitement. Her eyes still shut tight and her face and body as motionless as a statue i look longinly up at this strange and beautiful woman wondering who she is and how did i get so lucky this night. Suddlenly her eyes open a big satified grin on her face as she leans in close to my ear and says 'hi i'm jenny'

Monday, April 19, 2010

First time...p2

I slide my hand up and down speeding up unable to slow down until suddenly a strange and frightening sensation washes over me. I feel as if i need to pee and i rush to the bathroom and hope its not blood that comes out as i fear that i might have broken something by doing this thing that surely nobody has ever done before.Then this white milky substance explodes out of me and it feels unbeleivable, even falling stunbling to the ground doesn't seem to hurt and i lie there breathless on the the cold bathroom floor half naked with my eyes closed the biggest smile on my face.
For the next week i would spend almost every waking hour alone in my room fascinated by my new discovery. I couldn't beleive that i had never tried this before, after those first few weeks suddenely my new discovery became just another part of my life, like the need to eat or sleep everyday. It still felt amazing but nothing could compare to the thrill of my first time. Years later i wouldsearch and come close to discovering that thrill again with new sexual experiences. The first time i had sex the feel of soft wetness against me, the moans and look of pleasure on her face that i was causing to happen. The first time in my car where the thrill of getting caught by the cars passing every few minutes was such an adrenline rush, the quiet country lane we were parked on didn't offer much privacy if a car decided to suddenly stop there. Then there was the first time i actually did get caught in that car months later, the mad scramble to pull on clothes and hurriedly drive away, more of a thrill for me and an embarassing mortifying situation for her. I came close to capturing the thrill those few times but it wasn't until i was much older and jaded and searching for a new thrill did i find something extraordinary.
It was coming home late one sunday night, the train was almost abandoned bar two or three people on each carriage. I choose the one empty carriage at the back of the train and resting my head against the window under my jacket i closed my eyes and attempted to catch a quick sleep. The vibrations of the moving carriage was quite relaxing and i was fallen asleep quickly, only opening my eyes occasionally. Nobody got on for ages and i drifted off so when i finally opened my eyes again i was surprised to see this young blonde beauty looking straight at me. She looked away quickly when confronted with my sleepy stare back.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

First time...

You spend your whole life trying to recapture that moment, the moment when you first felt truly alive. Heart pounding,breathless, body shaking like a leaf, grinning uncontrollably like youv'e just unlocked the secrets to the universe, this is what it's all about, this is elusive meaning behind everything, what god put you here to find, enjoy and live in true bliss knowing.
It's different for each person, for you it may be the joyous birth of your newborn child, the smilen face of your little miracle and the tight grip of tiny fingers clasping yours. The job promotion, salary and respect you spend your life working towards, or the day you marry the person you love and promise to spend the rest of your life loving.
For me it happend at the tender age of thirteen in the confines of my small ensuite bathroom. There i was just home from school slumped on my bed tired from the monotony of school and the endless reams of mind numbing lessons and never ending homework.
Lying listless on my bed i start to think about my day trying to think of anything could that happened today, the incomprahensible information being throw at me, the crippling shyness, the self consciousness i feel every secound of the day. The beautiful girls in my class that i'll never be able to even say hi to let alone talk to.
Thinking about those girls some of them a whole year older than me, with incredibly pretty faces, soft sweet lips, hidden but heaving breast that are begging to be touched, oh to touch just one for a secound! and legs, legs that walk and sit and cross and uncross. Closing my eyes and getting lost in these thoughts i'm surprised when i feel a strange sensation and opening my eyes i realise my pants are feeling tight as my hand rubs up against my penis. I don't understand why but it feels great and i don't want to stop. So carefully unbuttoning my jeans and sliding them to the floor along with my underwear i'm left with swollen penis exposed.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Love is.....

''Love is a cruel game, there are unseen rules that you only learn with the blow of betrayal and the sting of regection. When you love you hand someone the keys to your heart and silently ask them to protect it, to keep it in a safe place and tirelessly guard it sheltered from harm.
Yet this act of trust leaves you vunerable, it gives someone complete power over you to raise you up and make you feel like a king with a tender stolen kiss on a winters night or to break and shatter you into frail pieces with just a handfull of unexpected words.
I sometimes think god is a malevolent trickster handing you happyness for the sole purpose of tearing it away from you when you come to need it most, laughing all the while at his cleverness and your stupidity.''
'' You done drowning in that pool of selfpity?''
''If you are i have something to show you that i think your really gonna enjoy, and damn do you need it boy haha, you ready?''
''Em i guess so...''